好烂的开始

唉! today 真倒霉!!
eat at restaurant 拉肚子.
play mahjong the cards oso 欺负 me 还输 the most.
reach home le, jelloe chew my brand new soviet titus specs into pieces..
chinese new yr 第一天 i oready so sway..
i wonder days to come, 怎么办? faintz.
bad luck dun surround me! go back to yr daddy! grrr...

敏感与无奈

在许多好友和家人眼里我应该算是个超级敏感的女生吧。我只觉得对人对事如果敏感一些，
顾虑到人家的感受，便可免去大多不必要的难过与无心伤害。
也许想多了，很多时候因敏感度过高，常把很无心的一句错话或小动作想成好复杂。再把脑里所认定的想法为事实，搞到自己很不开心。为人敏感，真不知是好事还是坏事！
没法啦，对于我的敏感， 只好请大家多多包涵。

变了的爱

人的一生能有几个有如海誓山盟真挚不变的爱？
爱情在每对恋人里都扮演着不同的角色但往往都逃不过变心的影子。
在爱情这条路上，又有几个可以完全保证自己永不变心呢。

即使當初愛得多么深，往往在心变後，一切的一切也会灰飛煙滅。而对于那个还守着那已远离了的緣份的另一方，繼續沈淪，繼續陷入迷惘可悲的无望等待，也還会是一場空。不是吗？
变了的爱能找得回来吗？我想很难。

或许爱不一定要彼此不变，只要曾經在爱的时候真心的愛過，當中的感動与感受，也应该够了吧。

幸福?

幸福是一种自我感觉,只要自己觉得幸福就是幸福了;自己感觉不到幸福,无论在别人眼里如何风光无限,你的心里仍是一片冰凉。

i wan out..

no word could ever exemplify the mixed feelins im havin rite now..

i wondered if some1 could feel so much euphoria and melancholia at the same time.

gosh, tis is hard.

evil tester

with a squeeze in my heart

my 1st tp attempt,

murdered in prematured death

dat i shld,

stick the gearknob up

my tester's ass!

read tis frm a blog while tryin to stay awake..
ha, new meanin i learn today.

Snow Blow
snow blow - sucking a dick with ice cubes in the mouth

woot!! :)

its 0732am n i can't get to slp. mus reach ssdc at 1035am.. so stressful!! gosh, tis is torturin.

pls pls pls let everything turn out well.. no immediate failure wif a score of below 18 so i can get my class 3 on first attempt! think i can't slp le.. so 'early' oready.

"dun release too much crutch.. slowly reverse.... see the 2nd pole den full lock to left.. everythin safety comes 1st... dun crutch in n roll b4 stoppin, brake first.." god, i can hear nothin but those words hummin in my mind. faint!

luck luck luck... pls gather ard me later. i realli need dat.

shoes shoes n more shoes!

went j8 wif adrian n meow yesterday.. we had dinner at crystal jade n both of em bought pants lolx. boys will grow up, dun they?

i bought shoes again. aiyo, was supposed to buy jus 1 pair of heels to go wif my little dress for new yr. endin up now, i have 2 new pairs which doesn't fit the dress at all.. lolx well, meanin i still hadda go hunt for the right pair. so "tiring" *winkwink*

von, wheres the whip u wanna pass me? lolx

she was beggin me to bring her home, i din haf a choice hehz

i was readin up on an article where pro-choice folks n pro-lifers actualli debatin against abortions caused by rapes, sexual mutilation, forced impregnation, enforced prostitution, forced sexual slavery. i was pretty much disgusted coz seriously, impregnations caused by those evil deeds still need to argue de meh? they seems to be onli interested in knowin or decidin on the unborns' fates. i mean, will them or do they help take care of the child after birth? i reckon not. after readin a particular quote by a Rev. Milhouse Pakalolo of Quayle Family Value Foundation...

"We feel that a rape or incest-enhanced little breeder must carry her child to term. There's nothing like a baby to bring a gal and her daddy closer."

... i was ready to puke.

Your Name: Jacqueline

01. artist you chose: jim morrison.

02. are you a male or female: im a doll. lolx

03. describe yourself: sick wif misery.

04. how do you feel about yourself: addictive..

05. describe your ex boyfriend/girlfriend: a beautiful creature.

06. describe your current location: very under the moon :(

08. describe where you want to be: promise land.

09. your best friend is: my wanderin mind.

10. your favorite color: dependin on my mood realli..

11. what's the weather like: weepy.

12. if your life was a television show what would it be: 101 escape frm reality.

13. what is life to you: im still tryin to figure out actualli. a transit maybe.

14. what is the best advice you have to give: nvr fall in love, hmm contradictive.

15. if you could change your name what would it be: i love my name.

16. tell me something about the person who posted this before you: mad.

how will u die?

took a test n tis is my result:
You will kill yourself, suicide, pills, jumping, or a gun.

when i was a child, oways sickly, my mum took me for a readin. dat fortune teller told her my previous life i was a socialite whom fell too hard in love n hung myself over an unworthy man n i din rid my karma wif my death.. wif dat curse, i will still murder myself tis life. my mum got very worried, thus i oways haf wat i wan frm her.
to enter death created by yr own hands has oways been appealin to me when i was in my teens. i used to stare down frm high rises n tot jumpin was cool.. wonderin aft my body hit the ground, will i still be able to hear at least for a moment the sound of my blood gushin frm any openins broken. dat would be the pleasure to end all pleasures.. perhaps wif beliefs dat the teller might be rite n it was my destiny + wifout fear frm dyin, bravery for stupid dangerous acts became norm routines. thinkin back, i think i owe my mum millions apologies for makin her helplessly worried sick.

older, my perceptions on suicide sorta took a turn. i began to think its rather dumb to die for a man, any man. eh actualli shld be, its stupid to kill 1self regardless of the many xcuses. to choose death over livin is nvr solutions, is an escape. onli weaklins do dat. wif undyin faith, i swore nothin n no1 can rekindle dat suicidal flame in me ever within my sane mind.

again, dat was so then..

today, i knew emptiness has somehow build a home in my heart. dwellin deep within, i slowly began to connect wif those who lived n died for wat they believed in: to taste tranquility in an instant flash. now, i reckon if 1 hafta choose death, thr mus be enuff sadness n unworthiness on livin n if dyin was the onli way out to rid dat sufferin, its more den alrite oready.

wateva possibilities i might actualli consider voluntery death tots pangs my mind. i constantly remind myself to take a moment to ponder b4 i crack. i hope 1 day i shall see all dat loves my soul is incapable of knowin, b4 dat wrong courage spreads its wings on me first..

my mind driftin away wif the tappin sounds frm the rain.. think i had succumed to tis nothingness aft sRo down for final closed-beta patch. good time to hug some1 n fall aslp 2gether yet thr is no1 here grrr... tis rain is leavin a lonely trail on me. faint!!

so floaty i feel. so weightless. was it coz my life had no meanin? still waitin for the day when i wun smile onli when i hafta n break down when i dun. til den, i jus hafta keep my composure.. so rain, shoo shoo!!

Rain fallin down frm heavenz

Always in hope it will wash away my pain

In its chill i dream

No more drizzle frm my weary eyes

"pass u the whip? haha.." dat was the immediate reaction of von when i tried on dat realli realli sexy pair. 2hrs at Jwest was not in vain lolx. 3pairs went home wif us wif 15% wifout sale!! wat an accomplishment. ha~!

想不开

很多时候人因想不开和放不下便会很难过，很痛苦. 只要有一天想通了，一切的一切便会ok了..

i certainly do not noe how loveable i am but yesh!! i love to be in love!! eh, but.. dun any1 else? go here to findin dat bear in u ba..

curious to noe wat i am aft learnin wat von is.. lolx feverish but still testable. ha!
click here to test for yrself ba.



The Wild Rose Random Brutal Love Dreamer (RBLDf)
Colorful, but unpicked. You are The Wild Rose. Prone to bouts of cynicism, sarcasm, and thorns, you excite a certain kind of man. Hoping to gather you up, he flirts and winks and asks you out, ultimately professing his love. Then you make him bleed. Why? Because you're the rare, independent, self-sufficient kind of woman who does want love, but not from a weakling.

You don't seem to take yourself too seriously, and that's refreshing. You aren't uptight; you don't over-plan. Romance-wise, sex isn't a top priority--a true relationship would be preferable. For your age, you haven't had a lot of bonafide love experience, though, and this kind of gets to core of the issue. You're very selective.

Your exact opposite:The Dirty Little Secret Deliberate Gentle Sex Master
The problem is them, not you, right? You have lofty standards that few measure up to. You're out there all right, but not to be picked up by just anyone.

ALWAYS AVOID: The Bachelor
CONSIDER: The Vapor Trail.

* you're never truly single as long as you have yourself *

feverish..

as i sat here to unwind, blog a little, so many tots came to the fore.. i guess i wanna pen down how touched i was. it was a bbq for me i knew. it was the loveliest communications dats voiceless.. no words needed to be said. all they wanted was findin my lost smile n happiness. like angels, they came to take me out of another 'rather stay hm' nite.. frm the bottom of heart i knew.. they, were the best thing dat could befall on me on dat sombre nite we called eve2006..

Something we were withholding made us weak, until we found it was ourselves.

~Robert Frost~