trapped

the bell tolls in my mind by a few simple words.. i feel a part of me dyin. thrs nuthin left behind of wat i thot was beautiful.. i felt my heart sentenced. either i will die of coldness or dissolve in the atmosphere of time.. time, how much time do i haf to waste? mayb angela was rite, it is rainin happiness ard me yet i no longer had clouds above my heart.. wtf, i dun even noe me aft all this years.. how come i nvr see my real face, my real heart, my real me? yes leave me alone, back off.. dats wat i wanted, isnt it jac? mayb hell is wat i wanted, wat i needed, wat i deserved..

yr heaven is not for me, and it nvr will be, frm now on.

wat a dream.

had another nitemare..

in the dark fog of a walkway
is a discernin you
wif devilish face
small and stopped up eyes
mouthfull of worms
u cried
i’ll make you suffer!!!

ok, dats bad enuff to wan to go back to bed.

@#$%^&*!

its weird how you can haf such peaceful weekend, and get your mind off of everythin. den the second you step thru the door, it all comes back. it seems like its all worse now. like it jus hit me for the first time. hate it especially when all i wanna is to put wrong tings rite but no matter how hard i tried, tings are still headin to the super wrong direction!
i noe i haf realli amazin family and frens, but sometimes i feel like im too much for any1 to handle. even me, myself. i feel disconnected frm em, like im in a little pace of my own and its a scary place to be. since i cant bring any1 in.. might as well stay thr on my own. perhaps its not being me dats xhaustin, its being the1 for the1 whos nvr been mine which is realli burnin away which ever left within me. over the past few days ive been feelin myself driftin deeper and deeper. why am i oways so fuckin depressed???!! perhaps im jus tired. mayb when im tired, either everythin is purely amusin, or everythin is extremely annoyin!! grrr...

ok, tink im not makin too much sense here but well.. at least im done. for now.

梦不到

已经好久好久都没有再梦到他了。
如果说日有所思夜有所梦，那是不是意谓着我不再那么想念着他？
他究竟在那里。为什么我总是捉摸不到。
不知他会不会像我现在一样的想着我？
这样莫名其妙的，非常非常的，刻骨铭心的，想起我。

原来大年初一的我一点也不开心。

rain + hm alone = borin!!

aiya 6:17 le still in office.. cant go hm yet coz rain is heavy!! zzzzz..

no1 fetch me home, abit lost. many many pple no cabbies. somemore CTE sure jammmm.

lolx *tink of the train ride + walkin back hm* = stresss

so while waitin for rain to stop, might as well blog alittle.

noon we went to vivo for lunch. duuno whr to eat so boss say marche.. hmm, as normal, nuthin much to eat oso thr. faintz anyway four of us took a pic. quite nice ma hor.. dats lizzie, me, shireen and ada..

gail n marv.. took tis pic when she on fone tryin to xplain to tis dumbo on how to get to our office. lolx check out her pissed off cum stress face.. actualli, quite pretty oso la she.

after makan we head to Toy R Us for more eggflips. got myself 2 more chicks and ta da! my latest collection! i need 4 more to complete the set.. who wan buy for me? lolx

ok la, me goin hm le.. later mj better be good!!! grrr..

二月十四 in office

it was 情人节 in office. Nuthin special for me coz practically my mood sure very laoya on holidays like such lolx. duuno y, dun ask me y. i wun noe how to ans.. but well, sometimes, a little surprise can be pretty sweet..

gail gave tis to all colleagues and of coz me haf la.. so sweet hor she. i no prepare anyting for any1 lolx... even my boss had 1.. he dinno who gib him, he oso no bother go find out.. so borin!

tis mini card frm jo.. it was oready on my desk when i reached office. hmm.. a very simple gesture dat warmed my heart.. ^^ eh!! now dat im lookin at it, y no hab my name???
eeeekkkk mass production huh!!! JOANNE!!!!!

tis 21 stalks of 红玫瑰 bouquet is frm a fren Charles, he's so sweet! 21 stalks actualli meant im devoted to you.. but how can.. lolx faintz i prettier or the roses prettier? aiya no need say, cfm i prettier la! hee..

ok la 2 of us who hab many many roses.. jo and hers frm jason.
not bad wor he, self-delivery to our office! men like dat whr to find...

johan came and surprised me wif tis realli HUGE bear n roses.. but the bear quite ugly! lolx.. countin, i hab 3 bears frm him oready... no more no more... no more bears pls...


i heard tis frm some1, dun rem who..
if luv is blind, y is lingerie so popular? lolx lolx

shanghai shanghai pics

Day 1 walkin along nanjing street.. i tink?

cant quite rem.. all i rem was ksn COLD~~~~

the air was freakin cold n dry but hor duuno why me so 犯贱, die die wan eat ice-cream. so gatherin most of us, we "force" our boss, Gary bring us go eat.. yum yum! but seriously,

quite ex.. not cheap to eat Haggen Daz in shanghai..
me liz marv and jojo + duuno whose hand (shireen?), njoyin...
but aft dat, i is cough non stop lolx!

very very long long walk to buy nuthin at tis nanjing xi road..

me & jojo... she ah oways hungry de!

took tis pic for lizzie, i tink im good lolx.. anyway, tis market is damn dirty. i sometimes love to litter.. tot i was bad, they lagi jialats, eat throw eat throw like no1 business. faintz..

famous & cheap 现做现卖 4 for 5rmb.. they simply loved it but to me, ok nia coz porky taste too strong. joanne loved it!!! if go shanghai, do rem to try, if u can tahan the long queue..

the 5 of us at the busy street of 诚皇庙..

wonderin why oways me & lizzie? i oso duuno wor, pple say 2 leos cannot get along..

the fact is we adored eachother.. heee.. i jus realised she frm my sec sch oso!! a few yrs junior den me though...

tot tis pic was very happ wif my sexy shades. faint le ma?

and lizzie and me wif the old shanghai wall street behind us!

the boat ride which lasted for 2hrs almost killed me. it was borin!!! scenery so so nia.. nuthin spect! waste time... grrrr... i no like boats!

see, i not the only 1 who is bored! lolx

went KTV.. So expensive!! boss wan go so we LL.. lolx
marv slpin den shireen n few of us garnish her a little, she din realised and still posed for foto takin aft she woke!! see the evil grinz frm us all!

any resemblance??? lolx.

last min shoppin.. last min pic taken.. me & marv, the gal who shared room wif me.

the gal who dun ..... hmm.. better not say lolx.

taken outside a peking duck restaurant.. so called famous 1 oso la. but other den the duck, the rest so so... onli! after the 4 ducks, we shall continue shoppin!!!
the sun so bright but its very very very very very cold......

inside the restaurant. check out the lambie!! BIG.. tastie i heard.

lol yes heard coz i dun eat lamb. can't stand the super 搔味..

my fav ex boss, winyen on the rite and my fav boss, gary on left and their mutual "eggflip" lookalike friend frm sg - shanghai... round round de he, very interestin!

shop eat shop eat shop eat.. dessert restaurant. dun rem name.

tink is 1 of the famous 1 again, but well, its quite lousy. n expensive!!!

strike a pose!! or 2!! lolxxx

makan at the airport before boardin back to sg..


actualli many more fotos but lazy le la... hmmphh..

DRAINED!!!!

shanghai shanghai

26 Jan 07

day 1 at airport, those taller ones in backrow: shireen in green tankie and beside her is ada ( her velcro takin picture for us, lol) next is my boss in red red limited edition "POLO" tee.. marvie in blue with jojo in her bright red glasses and and the most retard men i ever met, ALEX! ok la, not pissed wif him le but still... shrugs!

now is for those cuties in the front: me feelin cold oready in the jacket angela bought me with lizzie's face so near to me! dun tink she wan stick towards the other side oso. pengz. n after the BIG gap is daphne and eve, my boss PA! aiya lizzie posted 2 funny clips on Utube but i duno how to post the clip here.. so jus follo the link ba!

check out my fav gal lizzie and her "gimme chicken" on return flight frm shanghai..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTFFzrX47xI

me n lizzie in shanghai, almost retard in the cold.. lolx
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSskka_1rc0

will upload more interestin pics aft my 10mbps in action! haha.. ok, back to work!